Summer here is so other worldly and its precious as it doesn't last very long. Our bodies and souls are so hungry for the light and warmth that we try to do most everything outdoors.
This is the first Summer in years that my husband is taking more time off of work to be with us and our family as they visit and this time with him has been so sacred to me. Its why I haven't spent much time online and its why I needed to postpone my Fae Creative Prompt: {Fae}rie Tale Fridays for the time being. It wasn't an easy choice as it was something that I cared deeply for. It was inspired by an idea from my friend and for a few days it brought us so much life. It was a portal away from our every day and gave us permission to draw from the fantasy and the real and write with abandon. Yet, what I have learned since being a mother and especially a mama to a very spirited and intense being, is to listen to my spirit and my reserves and to make sure I am putting my energy towards where I am needed most.
With visitors coming and going, a new puppy and some serious growth spurts (two inches in two months!), its been quite a big month for my sweet and sensitive boy. Transitions are always a lot for him and energy and emotions in his body have required both my husband and I to be fully present.
Its hard to let go of things I care for. It always has been but I do find it easier than it used to be. I am feeling so deeply protective of my space, my home and my family these days and have for the past few years since moving here. Anything that causes drain or stress outside of our four walls that doesn't feel life bringing to us has needed to be let go. I know it won't always be this intense but for now, it just is and we are surrendering to it.
Its why being outdoors in the fresh air and healing sun is so so good for us. Our days here are long as it gets dark at 10:30pm and we soak in every morsel.
Despite the intensity and high emotions and serious mama stretching going on...I am the happiest I have been in years. I'm deeply happy in my marriage and more comfy in my skin and accepting of what is in front of me. I carry less fear about the overwhelm I feel as a mother to a beautifully spirited child and trust more in my intuition.
There are many days I am weeping to my sister or marmie on the phone because of exhaustion or in my husband's chest or in the arms of a dear safe friend but there is also deeper laughter, more cuddling, more intention for quiet and peace because how can you fully feel joy without fully feeling sorrow?
I invite all of it because I know I am a feeler, an empath and I've come to really accept and love that about myself.
