I am soooo full to bursting with joy about this! Truly honored to be part of this magical collective.
More juicy details and how to purchase this delicious book here.
a wee adventure.
me seaside, taken with palm pre
I am taking Cedar on a wee adventure. Will be back later in the week. It is SO needed. Its been a rough week due to some serious teething and growing pains all at once. I swear he woke up yesterday morning a foot taller. Okay, well at least a few inches. He is going to be a tall one. He is the height of an average 3 year old. I wonder when he's going to tower over little ole' me...when he's five?!?!?
Two tall boys in the home. I can see the jokes to be had in the future. Growing up, the running joke in our house was that my mother was adopted. We were all dark haired and mostly dark skinned and she was pure white with freckles and red hair. People sort of cocked their head sideways when she'd say "these are my girls!" It SO was not politically correct that we said she was adopted but now that I've adopted, I feel I can make light of it. ; )
I digress.
I was talking about our rough week. Yes. So yesterday I get a call from Boho Boy on his way home from work. He told me he wanted me to go see a movie tomorrow. Have some alone time. I had a huge lump in my throat and when I hung up the phone, a few tears spilled. I didn't realize how much I needed some "me" time until that moment and I felt so filled with gratefulness that he knew what I needed more than me. He truly is an amazing man. I heart him.
I chose to go see Twighlight: Eclipse. I just had to! I am a Twi-Geek. Read all the books in the same month. I was obviously in some serious need for light drama and fantasy and ethereal love stories that month. ; ) So there I was today sitting in the theater...a crushed out girl in a sea of crushed out girlies that are hot for vampires and werewolves. It was awesome! The collective clapping and sighing and squealing. The energy was so great and just what I needed. Escape! I'll be the first one to admit that I am a dreamer and love to escape now and then and one of my favorite things to do as a young adult until now is drive in a car, listen to music and dream up scenarios and adventures. It must be the writer in me.
So I end this wishing each of you a dreamy week full of imagination and adventures. I also want to end it with this adorable photo of Cedar. I FINALLY got him in his yogi pose. He does this all the time. Just sort of sits there in deep thought. I wish my limbs could do this with ease...
cedar, taken with palm pre
a sense of calm.
I took this photo yesterday while in the studio up in the loft. A few dear friends and I send photos of one another back and forth via our phones. Our way of feeling as close to skin as possible when all we have is words or phone calls.
I like what I see when I look at this picture. I am not talking about my outer self but my inner (although, what I do love about my outer self here is that the bottom of my feet are dirty from living barefoot).
I see a sense of calm and comfort in self...a peace.
I think so much of this calm comes from what I have been putting into my body. I have been mostly vegan for over a month now. I say mostly because I have tried fish a few times. Other than that, I have not put animal or dairy products into my body and I am pleasantly surprised at the result. First I have to say how completely bizarre it is to me that I am not craving either one of these. They were a pretty big part of my life...well, at least cheese was. The only meat I was eating on a consistent basis was turkey (sliced sandwich meat from whole foods) and lamb. But man, cheese was my chocolate (I don't really crave sweets and haven't for years).
What motivates me to not eat these things when placed in front of me are a few things. One is that I truly feel my morals are aligned with my choice to not eat animal or dairy. I have a deep love and respect for animals and I know some are treated kindly and respectfully (organic, free range, etc.) but most are not and this is my way of letting them know how deeply I feel for them and see their souls and bodies as sacred. Two is that I feel so much cleaner and less sludgy. I am motivated by that so much. I have little to no allergies or asthma and I have more clarity of mind. More patience. More calm. More love to give. More wide open spaces in my heart. More energy and lightness of being.
For me personally, it feels so right within. I feel more connected to nature than I have in so long. I feel more mindful when I am chewing a mouthful of kale and whole grains. I think about where it came from. The mindfulness of those that prepared the soil and took gentle care of the crops. The sun and the rain and the earth creating life through plants so that we can have energy and vitamins and minerals and LIVE and survive. I think that is where the calmness comes from. The wide open spaces I am talking about. The ability to slow down and take time to even think about my food in my mouth, where as before I was shoving it down my throat so I could get to the next task of my day.
Before I continue to share in posts, this journey with all of you, I wanted you to know that I am so careful to share my thoughts about the treatment of animals. I know this is a tender topic to so many people that consume animal products that are wonderful, amazing, enlightened, mindful beings. I hope I make it so very clear here on my blog that all of my choices are choices that feel right for me and my wee family. I do not project it onto other people. I do not judge. I always strive to come from a place of compassion and empathy, having been through so many journeys myself. Having eaten animal products all of my life. I have never been one to stand on a soap box about any one idea because I know we are all so different, coming from various life experiences. I leave room for all of it. Your choices are yours, my choices are mine and if there are good and kind intentions behind them, we can celebrate them together and in peace.
So, with that put out in the open, I will mostly talk more about how I feel physically and emotionally with this new way of eating, rather than focus on the treatment of animals and our dear Mother Earth. Although I will bring those topics up of course...but they will not be the focus. My mission is not to convert you. My desire is to spill my own experience, with hopes that you may feel as re-invigorated and inspired and empowered as I have to treat yourself more kindly.
Reading the book The Kind Diet opened up these spaces in me and now while reading the book The Hip Chicks Guide to Macrobiotics I feel like my spirituality and connection to nature and God and nourishment and the sacred feminine are being aligned. I also have the book Women, Food and God on my shelf but I find it really intense for where I am at right now in my life with a toddler. What I enjoy about the Kind Diet and Hip Chicks book is that they are simple, light, fun reads and that is about what my mama brain can absorb right now. I heard Women, Food and God is absolutely life altering and I will probably read it in small doses (which is what a friend suggested I do anyways).
I not only see and feel the shift within myself but it is flowing through in my marriage and in my husband as an individual. Boho Boy eats whatever I put in front of him and has seemed to love my recipes now more than ever. He has been feeling much of what I have and because of this, has been eating less and less animal products (he hasn't had dairy in years...he is lactose intolerant). I also see him slowing down. I see more patience with his work. The last few days he even started doing Tai Chi again. Something he really feels connected to.
I am also trying to incorporate more greens into Cedar's diet. My next post will be about how I am going with Cedar's flow on what he loves to eat but also trying to be creative in incorporating more plant life into his precious body.
I will end this with a yummy pasta I made that Cedar LOVED...
{gluten free spinach and fettuccine pasta tossed with an asparagus puree, topped with toasted pine nuts and rice based grated parmesan-texture cheese. recipe inspired from Heidi Swanson in her book Super Natural Cooking . i made a few tweeks for my dietary needs}
funny face*
cedar's funny face, 19 months
He's been making this face lately when he's unsure about something.
Its awesome.
Happy Birthday Boho Boy!
my boho boys in january, 2010
My dear husband turned 40 today.
I was madly in love with him the day we were married on a cliff, near the sea, with fabric flowing up top tall bamboo and lanterns and lights in the trees. We were surrounded by faerie magic and the deep love and support from our yummy family and dear friends.
Every day since that magical one, I fall deeper and deeper in love with who he is as an individual, husband, father, son and friend.
The other day he was sitting on the couch reading and I was across from him curled up in his brown leather man-chair. He asked me why I was looking at him so funny and I said "because you look a lot like you did the day we met in that kitchen in Santa Barbara early in the morning. Same shorts. Same type of shirt. Same tousled hair." I kept sacred to myself what else I was feeling. A little shy to keep going because he seemed embarrassed enough already. But my heart was swelling that I married that man and he we are, 8 years later and I am still so crushed out.
Please leave him some birthday yums in the comment section.
We are away from our family and friends and I so want him to feel wrapped up in love today from those that surround us in our life. I planned a spa day for him near the sea. A 90 minute deep tissue massage and a float tank. Then dinner at one of our fave places. YUM.
Here are 40 reasons why I love him.
1. He is so very witty and makes me laugh every. single. day.
2. He loves to read and reading is sexy.
3. He can be the life of the party or the quiet one in the corner reading. Love that.
4. He has an open mind and is not a fan of labels/boxes on ideas/people.
5. He has the most beautiful forest green eyes. They sometimes look gray or brown. Awesome.
6. He has a deep understanding and appreciation for the sacred feminine.
7. I feel he truly sees me and wants me to be ME.
8. He has always encouraged and supported my dream to be a freelance artist/writer.
9. He has worked so hard since I met him so that one day soon we will all live somewhere in the country and work from home, doing what we both love and teaching our child(ren) how to follow their dreams.
10. He has such a deep well of patience and has taught me to be more patient.
11. He has taught me to breathe deep and ask for space when we disagree, so that it doesn't escalate to a place where we say things we don't mean.
12. He gives the best hugs ever.
13. He is 6'2 and I am 5'3 and...well, that is yummy.
14. He loves camping in the redwoods of Norther California. I grew up camping there.
15. He loves/needs to live near the ocean. Me too.
16. He is a writer and has been writing a trilogy for years. It is Awesome. That's hot.
17. He wants to build us a meditation dome in our backyard someday.
18. He is a self taught construction dude (love him in a tool belt).
19. He grew up with a mother from Germany that loves traveling, hosting parties and cooking and a father that was an archeologist/anthropologist/professor/musician and a brother that is a fine artist hippy. A truly bohemian fam.
20. He is willing to try any way of eating and always jumps on board with me when I start a new thing (currently Vegan).
21. He does Tai Chi in our living room with our son running in and out of his legs.
22. He is a very present father to Cedar.
23. He has been in a band and is an awesome drummer. He drums on everything.
24. He walks around naked, very comfy in his skin. Its inspiring.
25. He is very open minded about spirituality.
26. He loves/admires both Jesus and Buddha (me too).
27. He introduced me to Sci-Fi and brought out my inner Geek from 6th grade that felt she had to be something other than who she was to be loved and accepted. I now embrace the Geek in me.
28. He wants to travel to Thailand someday. Me too.
29. He loves and is proud that his lady is a Boho.
30. He reads my blog every time I have a new post.
31. He supports and encourages girly get-aways for me.
32. He loves to Kayak. Kayaking is hot.
33. He appreciates and loves my curves.
34. He needs communication to feel truly intimate with a woman and is not afraid to admit that.
35. He went to therapy for a while before we met and had self-help books in his bookshelf. That is hot.
36. He wants to build us a straw bale house someday.
37. He wears drawstring pants and rainbow sandals in the summer. HOT.
38. He wasn't afraid to tell me he wanted to marry me a few weeks after we met. Love his brave heart.
39. He thinks being a man is being in touch with your emotions and knowing who you are. HOT.
40. I always dreamed of marrying a man from a different country. He's Canadian. Canadians ROCK.
Bonus fact: He taught me the concept of asking one another "what are you afraid of?" during disagreements or grumpy moments. It shifts from projecting to introspection. YUM.
first music & dance class!
My friend Stacy was in town with her family and spent the day at Sea World. It was there where she found what she called a REALLY hot mama resembling Cameron Diaz. This hot mama told Stacy about a yummy boutique called Hillside Artisans where you can find delish shoes, toys and books. So she sent me a text about it and the next day I dragged my boys over to this place...just for fun. ; )
SO adorable.
Upon entering, we hear a woman singing in an adjoining room and she motioned over to us "So glad you're joining us, come in! Its free!" It was a music and dance class. There was only one other mother with her three year old daughter. We couldn't refuse.
Cedar was a bit shy when he first sat down with daddy. The teacher's voice was quite loud and she was singing right to him and his body language was that of pulling back. But then he warmed up within a few minutes and oh my, was he in his element!!
The next hour was one of the funnest we've had with him ever. As I've written here many times, he is just so connected to music and instruments and his whole body gets into the groove of it (especially with folk, bluegrass and oldies). So to see his face light up and then break into dance was AWESOME. The teacher wasn't expecting that at all. It warmed my heart for her to recognize his soul. He was really free with it all. He kept handing all of us his intruments and ribbons, wanting us to join. My mama heart melted all over and I got teary quite a bit. Boho Boy just beamed and got into drumming.
Cedar and I are solo, so so much of our days and this is why I try to go to Java Mama or the park as much as possible. So many have suggested I find a play group of some sort and I've looked at many options online. I haven't felt a pull towards any one group and as usual, trusted my gut with Cedar so much that I knew something would come along that felt right for us.
I love how beautifully this came into our day. That is how so many things in my life have worked. Just sort of putting that wish out to the Universe and serendipity surprises me with something so suited for my soul. I felt that this was so suited for Cedar's soul and felt grateful that being patient and trusting this process blessed him in this way.
The teacher has more classes at her own studio around the corner. So we are investing in a 6 week music/dance class for him, where a lot more kids will be there. I think this is a beautiful way to introduce him to socializing with others, in a place where he thrives and feels safe to be himself.
I wanted to share images I captured of the hour...
Walking to the boutique:
He's feeling a little freaked out and uncertain:
"Head and shoulders, knees and toes!" He knows this song, so he is feeling some familiarity:
He gets out of daddy's lap and decides he wants to pretend he is painting on the wall:
Okay, warming up to the idea:
Playing with shakers. He kept handing them to everyone.
Introduction to ribbon dancing! He was listening intently:
Wanting to share his ribbons:
This is when he let loose. Twirling, waving..woohoooo!!
Class done. He let out an "OMG, THAT ROCKED" yelp:
Walking back to our car. Resting on daddy. 
Driving home. Leading to the best. nap. ever.
Then end of a day I will always cherish. The day when I felt a world open up for my son.
sacred spillings.
my view from the kitchen this morning
This week I have really felt the vibrational pull of the full moon. Feeling very introspective and sensitive to feelings of others and my own. Cedar too is quite tender. We went I believe a whole month without the emotional and physical upheaval of teething. It seems to have returned with a vengeance and with it, behaviors like throwing food, slapping mama and throwing his bottle across the room. Because I too am in a tender place with my cycle and the moon approaching, it has taken so much inside of me to take deep breaths and be compassionate about the source of his frustration and not take it personally. Boho Boy is so much better at it than I am but that could be from over 10 years of experience he had teaching elementary school. I feel like teachers should have tattoos on their forearms to remind them of the second out of Toltec wisdom's Four Agreements: Don't Take Anything Personally.
The myriad of emotions I have in regards to Cedar in a manner of just a few minutes blows me away. How I can love him so much I could cry and then need space from him and then want to hold him close and then feel hurt if he acts out at me and then laugh at his funny ways...and that was just 10 minutes. Its overwhelming and has taught me so much about myself. It has helped me slow down. It has reminded me to stay present. It has required me to tap into the deepest parts of my sacred feminine for wisdom that was not realized until now.
So much of that wisdom tells me to be gentle on myself. To be gentle and empathize with other mothers, fathers, caretakers from all types of journeys. To have compassion.
I was spilling with a dear friend of mine about some tender spaces of my journey as a mama. One of them being how even though I felt confident about some choices I made for Cedar, I felt judged at times by other mothers. Mostly strangers that would see me at a park or in the aisles of a whole food grocery store. Whether it be me feeding Cedar with a bottle or placing formula in my grocery cart or organic jarred baby food, at times other crunchy mamas would give me a disapproving look. As Cedar would be gleefully sitting in the cart (because from day one, he hated to be confined in a carrier of any kind and needed to be FREE), a mama carrying her babe tight to her chest would give me two glances and looked concerned. One women shook her head when she saw me place Earth's Best pureed food in a jar into my cart...and when at Target placing formula into my cart, a mama actually told me she was surprised I was feeding my baby formula. Do I really need to go into my story that he was adopted and I didn't have enough time to get my milk going with herbs? Or that even if I did, I had a deep fear that the herbs wouldn't work (since it didn't work for me with fertility) and the last thing I wanted to be doing was putting energy into feeling like a failure rather than feeding my son in peace and filling his belly up in a way that felt right for us? That he had GERD and needed a special type of formula to soothe his burning throat and gut? Did I need to gently pull that woman aside at Whole Foods and share with her how many times I paid hundreds of dollars on organic yummy veggies and fruit to puree it myself and for some reason that I couldn't figure out, my son would refuse to eat it and only wanted jarred food?
No...I didn't need to explain all these things to them and thankfully when these things would happen, I was in a centered space and felt deeply connected to my own story. I have always listened to my gut about Cedar and went with his flow and he is thriving and happy and well and for this, I am so blessed. So blessed that for the most part, I haven't felt a need to justify any of this.
We all go into a journey with expectations. When I married my husband, I wanted to be fully pregnant with his child. I wanted to birth my baby in a tub, leaning on his bare harry chest, guided by a doula or midwife and screaming out to God and my tribe from around the world to get me through the surges. I wanted to pull my child from between my legs and onto my chest and be wrapped up in my husbands arms. I wanted many things but those things evolved and changed and something wildly different ended up happening.
Cedar found us in another way. I caressed the belly of another goddess to speak to my child. I watched him come out between her legs and be whisked away by doctors with gloves into another room to help him breathe and take out the liquid in his lungs. I held him for the first time fully clothed and just a few hours past me arriving at an airport. But it was beautiful and the connection I felt as his mother was instant and later that night as we lay with him in a hospital bed, and my husband told me I've never been more beautiful...I realized our story was perfect for us. I was exactly where I wanted to be. My expectations fell by the wayside and I felt fully present with what was.
I just wish in a sea of mothers that hold so many expectations on themselves and others, that we could embrace one another's journeys. That breast feeding mamas, could comfortably sit near bottle feeding mamas and not feel awkward or disappointed in the other.
My friend Brooke said something to me that has lingered deep for a few days now. She is an urban-earth mama that I deeply respect and learn so much from...
Feeling held to standards and rules, that takes the heart and soul out of parenting. It makes us, as mothers, guilty and it disconnects us from listening to our children as individuals. It prevents us from showing up to the moment and doing what needs to be done given the circumstances we face. It denies us the gift of being alive to every breath and listening to our hearts. The rules become the goal rather than the true goal - in this case, a thriving, nourished healthful child.
These camps and rules and parenting identities - from homebirth to breastfeeding to attachment parenting - it sets up wars and builds walls between us. They are labels and ideals tearing us apart. It makes me so sad that good intentions are actually victimizing us and keeping us isolated from one another.
I really connect to this and with her permission, I wanted to share this with you. Whether you are a parent or not, I know so many of you are nodding. This can apply to so many things in our life, really. I am putting a plea out to the Universe, to gather gentle, open minded souls to continue creating change, gentle change with these tender parts of our journeys. Journeys of all types...not just mother/parenthood.
two things that are really fun...
Cedar learning how to run FAST like the wind, accompanied by joy soaked giggling!
A few of my photographs published in the Summer edition of Boho Magazine! Go grab a copy. So many delicious articles, gift ideas and eco-yumminess. I heart Gina, the editor. She created such a dreamy mag emulating her desire to live authentically and environmentally.
So totally fun (and rad).
xo
from Boho Boy in honor of Father's Day.
me & cedar swinging at a park, taken by my wife
Before I met my wife I was a ‘Fixer” You know.. the guy who loved to fix everyone's problems except their own. Was so easy that way. Mr. Helpful… don’t worry about me… I’m fine. After the umpteenth failed relationship, I figured it was time for some soul searching. So I went on a quest of self discovery and improvement.
I went to counseling and had to do the hardest thing I ever did: turn that magnifying glass on myself. It was painful. But the good kind of painful. Those of you that have done “the work”, know what I am talking about.
One day in my best friend's kitchen in Santa Barbara a door opened and out walked my wife. I knew it the second I saw her. A calm soft voice whispered to me, “There she is”, and that’s what I said out loud.
The urges to ‘Fix” and help all came rushing back in our first few conversations. The White Knight on his gallant steed. But she reminded me: “I don’t want you to fix anything... just hear me”… and I was stopped dead in my tracks. I didn’t want the old patterns to ruin this one. I took a deep breath and let go. All I had to do was love her, with no expectations. It’s so much easier that way.
And now I get to do the same for my incredible son.
Happy Fathers Day.
Love,
Boho Boy
me & cedar this weekend at a bookstore, taken by my wife
my father*
photos from my wedding in 2004, by robin nations
I've been waiting for a special time to talk about my father...just him. Today I've walked around my house and it seems my every thought is about him. Times we shared together. Things we feel and have said to one another or haven't said but wanted to. I am writing this with a lump in my throat and warm tears forming. I think these tears carry so much. My love for him is deep and wide and I wonder if he truly knows this. I think he does.
He was never a man of many words. Growing up, he was mostly a man of funny sounds or jokes to make his three girls laugh. I am not sure if he knew quite what to do with the overwhelming amount of estrogen in our home. He just made it fun, I suppose. He never made us feel he wanted a boy. He was happy and proud of his girls. I just think when we all sat around gabbing and giggling, he was secure enough to sit there quietly and drink us all in. He never felt he needed to be the life of our party or compete with our energies. He quietly let us shine with an enormous smile underneath his brown high cheek bones.
When my father did speak, we listened intently. We soaked it in like water to a sponge. His words were few but selectively wise and clear if we needed advice. I think I inherited this from him. I remember once my boss explaining to a sea of corporate dudes during a meeting when I was asked my opinion..."Denise doesn't say much but when she does, we need to listen." I am proud to carry that gift he gave to me.
There are many memories I have of him that are dear to my heart. I will share a few that I hope give you a wee glimpse into the man that he is.
There was a time when my father would go on nightly walks around our neighborhood and I would join him. Sometimes we each would have our earphones in with different music. Sometimes we would walk in silence because we didn't feel the need to fill the space with words. Sometimes we would chatter about everything and nothing. But he always made sure he walked closest to the street on the sidewalk. I never really thought much of why he wanted to do this until I finally asked after walking with him for weeks. He said; "Because if a car were to hit us, they would hit me first." I remember quietly taking this in, watching my feet on the pavement and holding back tears. I felt so safe with him.
Every summer we would camp as a family at San Mateo Memorial Park. Being surrounded by tall redwood trees and the smell of camp fire was my father's bliss (and mine too). Many times we would go on a hike alone. It was something I looked forward to every year...the adventures we'd go on together in the woods. One time, he slipped and fell quite a few feet down a cliff. I screamed for him and panicked and while he was the one scraped and bruised and trying to climb up to safety, it was him who tried to calm me. I grabbed his hand and lifted him up with all of my might. I remember a flash of what it would be like to lose him. I hugged him tight and we moved forward, perhaps him not wanting to disappoint me by turning back. It is that hike that lingers clear in my mind the most. The hike that made me realize he may not always be here and to not take any of those moments for granted.
Then there was the time I moved to Texas to be near my best friend and explore living in a place so totally different than what I was used to. He wasn't keen on my going because he wanted me near but he supported me. So much so that he offered to drive me there. It was an amazing road trip: California to Texas...him and me, windows down, hot wind blowing through the truck, a mixed tape I had made. Little did I know that hotel after hotel, he would wait until I was sleeping to keep a journal. He kept every receipt (gas, food, snacks, gifts) and taped them in the journal and wrote what we did that day. He also explored his feelings about losing me to this massive State of Texas but it was one thing he wrote that will stay with me forever: "We had been driving too long without stopping and I grew tired. You were sleeping and my eyes were heavy and trying hard to stay awake. The next thing I knew I was swerving to the next lane when my eyes opened and my heart raced. I was determined to stay awake and take care of my precious cargo." He gave this journal to me when he said goodbye before driving back to California by himself. It made me weep. Both the idea of him being alone on the drive and that he would make such a beautiful journal for me while I slept.
Oh daddy...there are so many deeper sides of you that people do not see. But I always have. I have felt connected to you in this way as long as I can remember. Even in my toddler years when I stood up on a chair and you let me play with your thick black curls on your head. I knew you then. You've been intimidating to some, a mystery to others and a bright smile and goofy spirit that lights up a room...but to me, you are all of those things and so much more. I see you.
I am so proud to be your daughter (and look like you) and I hope to carry the gifts you have given me to my child, the way you did for me.
I will always let you call me Booch. ; )
Happy Father's Day.
p.s. my sister Darlene's tribute to our father here.
reconnecting.
cedar drumming on blue, almost 19 months
My niece left yesterday. The house feels quiet. Having her here was dreamy. We spilled for hours from the deepest parts of ourselves. Cedar was so totally crushed out. I think one of the most dreamy moments was her and I cuddling on the couch watching So You Think You Can Dance and her running her fingers through my dreads, down my neck and gently scratching my back while my head was on a pillow, resting on her lap. I don't remember the last time this was done for me. Boho Boy is a wonderful cuddler but not really a back scratcher. Neither am I but Angela inspired me to do this for those I love. She shared with me that she does this with her girlfriends and her boyfriend. She has such a giving heart. It felt intimate and soft and I melted into her while she did it for a full hour. This was my favorite moment. We ate delicious vegan meals and shared recipes. I feel so full of excitement for her adventure in Thailand approaching and so giddy that she found a life partner to share these experiences with.
angela & cedar, taken with phone
This morning I met with an old friend I worked with at the Gap in Northern California. Did you guys know I worked there? Yes. For five years. Both the Gap and Banana Republic. Boho Trivia! Her name is Jen and she was the visual coordinator there. I always admired her for her artsy ways and her wit and beauty. We also shared a passion for Deaf culture and sign language and went to school for this together. The best part of this relationship was that we were friends for a year before we discovered we were related. Her Aunt walked into the Gap while we were both greeters but she was not only her aunt, she was my sister's grandmother thru her marriage. It was awesome.
Today we snuggled under an umbrella outside of Java Mama with her preteen boys and Cedar. He is in a tender space right now while he is teething again but they were so gentle and determined to befriend Cedar. Within an hour, they were all on the ground, helping Cedar draw on a magazine.
tender bean today at the java mama playground outside
Oh, speaking of...new passion of his. Cedar drawing. He wants to do it all day long. With crayons or pens. He actually stays on the paper and is so precise. Jen was blown away.
Anyways, so neat to connect with an old friend and be reminded that she witnessed the first time I ever got sick from alcohol when the Gappers took me out for my 21st birthday. I was a good little Christian girl that didn't party. They were determined to get me drunk. It worked.
Now she sits across from me years later, as a glowy, soft, warm and gentle mother-spirit that is beginning a journey eating Vegan. I marvel at how life and friendships ebb and flow and journey off and come back again to find even though I have evolved into a completely different spirit, so has she and we connected on another level.
Have a weekend full of sweet, breezy moments of breathing deep and letting it flow and reconnecting with a sweet part of your past.
jen, her boys & cedar at java mama
thailand bound*
angela {my big sis darlene's daughter}, canon 50d
My niece will be here in a few hours. She'll be sinking into the Boho home for a week before she ventures off to Thailand with her lovely boyfriend. She's going there to get me some pretty things explore and connect and deepen and bond with her man and her surroundings.
I am excited to send her off with a full belly and a light heart. She too is a foodie and is on a conscious journey of her mind, body, soul. I admire her commitment to Bikram Yoga, which she has done 3 - 4 times a week for a few years now. She rocks my world!
We look forward to playing in the kitchen together. I love that she shares my passion for whole, healthy and YUMMY food. We are so not about depriving ourselves of food tasting so good that our taste buds explode.
Most of her life, Angela has been told "you look so much like your aunt Denise"..."you ARE so much like your aunt", la la la...and part of me felt so darn proud of that (because ummmm...she's WAY more beautiful and cool) but another part of me wanted her to find her own spirit and way of being. To not feel like she is growing up in my shadow. I write this with tears so in awe of who she has become. She is indeed her OWN person, leaving the valley, setting up camp in San Francisco and dancing to the beat of her own drum. We are still kindreds and share many interests and have similar mannerisms but we are different people, blossoming from different experiences, learning from one another, walking side by side. No shadows. Just light.
Since I became her aunt when I was 12 years old, we pretty much have grown up together...and I consider her a dear friend in my circle of goddess sisters that help me evolve deeper into the woman I want to be.
All of my nieces and nephews are yummy and teach me. Blessed, I am.
{angela & her boyfriend at a wedding...isn't he fab?}
art together.
I woke up not feeling as sprite as I have been. Something to do with pollen flying around in the air and freshly mowed grass and me being highly allergic to both.
But this, oh man...THIS time together with Cedar making free flowing scribbles...made it all so much better (with The Wailin' Jenny's to keep us company).
What are you up to this weekend?
earth dance goddess.
I just discovered this video through a few friends on Facebook. It inspired me so much, I needed to share it with all the goddesses that come here.
Ohhh...how beautifully fantastically gorgeous, hot, earthy and soulful is she? She moves like butter with that round god circling her body. I want to move freely like this again. I want the walls to come down and to feel my spirit roar like this...with the rhythm, with the Mother, with the sun and the moon and the sky and all that breathe life.
Watching her reminds me of a class I once took while living in Berkeley...being circled by like minded men and women and me in the middle, letting it all unravel beautifully in body.
Mmmm mmm. Thank you earth dance sister, for reminding me and showing me the way.
from a whisper to a shout.
I took this photo today. Boho Boy and I were laughing at Cedar's supermodel lip pout. I just had to share it. I think I need to wear brighter colors. My sister liked this green on me...and when I wore a bright turquoise shirt once she said I looked 10 years younger. I have always gravitated towards muted colors. Earthy. Every once in awhile I'll put on a shirt like I did in this photo and I do notice it brightens up my world a bit. Just something I was thinking about today.
While at Java Mama Cafe today, a song came on and Cedar stood up with the truck he was playing with in the play area and did three twirls. The parents looking out at the play area from the bar looked at me and laughed. It was awesome. And then three parents came up to me and said "your daughter is so cute."
Boys twirl too. ; )
So we are toying, flirting, playfully talking about the idea of living life on the road for a year before we move to Bellingham. Getting an RV and tricking it out Boho Style. Giving Cedar the whole country for his playground. We're doing some research. Chatting with a few friends/bloggers that are currently living life on the road. Each of us have a practical side. I'm a Virgo. He's a Cancer. Well...that says it all. But we also have a gypsy side and truly wonder if this is the only time we can really do something like this. Drive from yummy place to yummy place, visiting family and friends, setting up camp and exploring as we both work our online jobs (I swear my ecourse is going to come to fruition...I swear).
More on the idea of us having wheels for a home soon...if it blossoms from a whisper to a shout.
Sponsor GIVEaway.
The experimental art e-courses have been designed to release the natural artist that exists in all of us. The course is jam packed with exciting experiments that will also suit practicing artists who may need fresh inspiration and an opportunity to try something new. I’m sharing great innovative techniques I’ve picked up on my own art journey, providing a chance for others to delve deeply and fully into art’s possibilities and discover your own true niche creatively. The final magical ingredient is you as you take this artistic journey into wild sketchbook experiments, painting, mixed media collage and experimental photograph taking, plus more, whilst sharing with a group of like minded individuals in our private on-line space.
portrait of amelia
Amelia Critchlow is a mixed media artist, dreamer and creator of the experimental art e-courses who lives and works in London, UK. With a BA Honours Degree in Fine Art, Amelia regularly participates in selected shows, fairs and exhibitions around the UK, and became a qualified art tutor whilst doing her degree and has since taught in well-known galleries, museums, colleges in the UK. Amelia has discovered her true passion of using art to explore personal experiences and her journey through life, using a variety of media to process and express. She shares these thoughts and experiments with art and life on her blog and website. She has now taken her desire to share art on-line by launching the experimental art e-courses – providing a chance for all those wishing to discover their creative potential to be able to do so all from the comfort of home . . . Amelia is passionate about art and believes in it’s power to encourage well-being, fulfillment and a way to connect for all, and welcomes anyone with a calling, to join the experimental journey into discovering the natural artist in you!
mixed media on canvas
You can learn more about Amelia on her website.
Giveaway Info:
Amelia is giving away a free collage starter kit to the first person who signs up for the Summer 2010 Experimental Art e-course (starting on Monday, June 14th 2010) by leaving her a message that you found the e-course through Boho Girl.
collage starter kit
She looks forward to meeting all those who want to take this Summer creative journey!!
i. love. him. so.
boho boy at the park
The other day I was writing a friend about my husband. I shared how when we first started dating, that my heart was guarded. I had a few romantic relationships in the past that made it difficult for me to trust the words "I Love You", so I was treading lightly. Boho Boy was in a space of complete openness. He had been single much longer than me and with that time had done so much self healing and therapy and was so Zen.
One night he told me... "I love you and want to be with you for the rest of my life but I don't have any expectations for you to feel the same."
That was when I allowed myself to fall.
"Funny how fallin', feels like flyin'..."
~ Jeff Bridges & Colin Farrell ~ Fallin' & Flyin off the Crazy Heart Soundtrack
the kind diet.
basket of crazy delicious veggies
ingredients to healing soup
vegan brown rice wraps
baked maple lotus root yummies {recipe in Kind Diet book}
I just touched on the surface of this Kind Life journey for me. I still have so much to learn and so much time to feel my way through this new way of being conscious with my mind, body and soul. I will share as I move through it.
Links I mentioned in vlog:
Stacy, from Bella Wish (inspired and encouraged me)
Alicia Silverstone's Kind Diet book
Her Kind Life website
Whole Foods Market
Books/Sites others have suggested:
Gluten Free Vegan blog
The World Peace Diet by Will Tuttle
The Hip Chick's guide to Macrobiotics by Jessica Porter
Vegan Comfort Food by Alicia Simpson
you*
cedar eating celery at our friend's house in santa barbara
Today was spent settling back in after being gone for a long weekend in Santa Barbara. It was really dreamy being there. So many wonderful memories. Not only the place where I met my darling husband but also the place where I came to heal, driving down from Berkeley, without much of a plan. I was 30 years old and ready to spread my wings and start a new chapter in my life. Our time there was spent reveling in many heart soaked, late night talks and also drinking a mouth watering smoothie called Betterfinger at Blenders in the Grass. Its like a liquid Butterfinger but healthy...sort of. Fresh squeezed carrot juice, peanut butter and frozen soy blend. Who would have thought?
I am going to do a vlog for you hopefully tomorrow. I want to connect with you in that way. It feels more intimate and raw.
I would also love to hear from you. Even if it is just a simple hello. Say hi and where you are from or tell me something yummy about your day. I love to bridge that gap between writer and readers from all over the globe. I am equally inspired by the way you all seem to come here and spread your gentle wisdom and comfort and love. Do say hello in the comment section. Let me see you! Even you shy beans!
p.s. don't you just LOVE the door in this photo? it is at our friend's house in SB. its also rounded at the top. so so so dreamy.
reading is sexy.
my boys at east beach, santa barbara {memorial day weekend}
; )